The Writing and Photography Blog of Kevin J Sabo

This morning I’m feeling tired.

Between work articles and my history paper that I’m working on, the last few days have been busy. My week actually pretty much exploded on Monday, and doesn’t look as if it’s going to slow down before Saturday, making it the busiest week I think I’ve had in quite some time.

Still, as busy as I’ve been, I’ve still been maintaining my workouts every day, and maintaining my 10 000 steps a day. Surprisingly, I’ve even found a few minutes to fire up the Playstation and play Red Dead Redemption II for a bit.

This week has been having an effect on me though. I’ve been finding it harder to get out of bed in the morning again, and this morning, despite forcing myself up, I was just too tired to drag myself down to the gym for a workout. The irony is I know that it would have woken me up if I did. Instead, I opted to watch the news, drink some coffee, and get an early jump on some work.

I have to take the car in for a repair this morning, and then run a couple of errands downtown before coming home. My plan is to come home later and get a workout in before lunch, then do some more work this afternoon before I have to run out to Halkirk for a meeting this evening.

While I am definitely feeling fatigued, I am feeling good though. I feel like I’m actually accomplishing things. I know I can’t keep this pace up indefinitely, but I know I don’t need to. The thing is, I want to see what I’m capable of. I have not been tested to this level in I don’t know how long, and I want to see what I am capable of.

The fact that I have been able to maintain the way I have so far tells me how far I have come, though I would be blind not to see a few cracks starting to form in my foundation. The fatigue and not pushing myself to workout are examples. Yet, I’ve still been making myself do the work. It may not be in the morning when I want it to, but it’s still getting done, and to be honest, if I don’t get the workout done in the morning, what’s the big deal? I’m doing the work for my own self improvement, not for anyone else. As long as the work gets done, that’s the main thing.

I know I’ve spoken about Jocko Willink before. He is a former Navy SEAL commander who now makes a living as a motivational speaker. He has a podcast where he discusses discipline and lessons learned in the teams. One thing he said that really resounded with me is his attitude towards procrastination.

As a general rule he doesn’t believe in procrastination, however he has a caveat to it where it comes to working out. If you’re tired and want to rest for a day, do the workout anyway, and then when tomorrow comes, if you still feel like you need to take a rest, then take it, but in his experience, and in mine since I’ve started doing it, chances are you’re not going to feel that way. Chances are you’ll feel better and charge on ahead.

To me, it doesn’t matter when I get the workouts done, as long as I manage to slot them in at some point during the day. If I need to wake up a bit and get some other stuff done before hand, so be it.

Feeling tired is not the end of the world, and the tired I am feeling is not the soul sucking fatigue that I was feeling before my last admission. The tired I’m feeling now is that of hard work and accomplishment. As long as I can manage to get through the next few days and get everything done that I need to before Saturday, I can take some downtime over the weekend.

As for my History paper, I’m giving myself until the end of next week to get it done so I can get back on track with my studies. I’ve lost a couple of weeks in my course due to a variety of reasons, though granted it was mainly because of me being indecisive as to which essay I was going to write, but I am still not critically behind, and I still have ample time to get back on track.

Kevin