“new normal”

It has been an emotionally trying few days.

Brenda’s dogs Taffy, Skor, and Rolo. Taffy and Rolo joined our pack back in February, and Skor was rehomed.

We said our final goodbye to Brenda yesterday. Today was a lighter day, but not without it’s own emotional drain.

We met up with some of Lynn’s family that had come for the funeral and had breakfast with them before they hit the road back to the Winnipeg area. After breakfast we retreated to Lynn’s mom’s house, and I pulled up a couple of slideshows of photos from our anniversary last year and a family games night we had around the same time.

This afternoon we met up with my folks again and toured the Melville and District Museum, which was really cool. I got lot’s of great photos. After the museum we did a a quick family photo shoot outside in the park area of the museum.

After the photos, Lynn, her mom, and I went into Brenda’s house to look through stuff that is being prepared for an estate sale happening next week. We pulled a few things out that we didn’t want to part with, but as painful as it is a lot of it needs to go.

Being in Brenda’s home today was difficult. It was my first time in the home since she died in February. I wish I could adequately explain the emotions welling up in me while we were there. To me, the home felt like it was full of negativity echoing from the tragedy that occurred there. I had a hard time being in there for more than a bit at a time. I know it’s all part of grief, but it doesn’t mean I like it.

Tonight has been going through stuff at Lynn’s mom’s place, and getting the car loaded up for tomorrow. I head home tomorrow, have a work commitment Wednesday, then a run into Stettler on Thursday. Taffy, Rolo, and Sirius come home with me Thursday on my return trip from Stettler.

Hopefully now that we’ve said our goodbyes life can start to settle into “new normal.” I say “new normal” because after a loss like this things can never be normal again. I know how Brenda’s loss has affected me. I cannot even begin to imagine what Lynn and her mom are going through.

I feel bad that I have to leave while they are still dealing with all of this. I know they are both struggling with everything that has happened. However, I have been as supportive as I can be, and I will continue to do so, albeit from a distance.


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